I am not a networker. I go to career events and I hate the 15-30 minutes of networking before the class starts. I despise it. I sit there, reading the pamphlet and counting down the minutes until the workshop starts.

I have read all the advice. I know that networking works. It makes the difference in getting jobs. (If you doubt me, read this excellent article) But I still can’t bring myself to do it.

I like people. I love learning from people. I love discussing work and opinions with people. I just hate the process. I hate trying to introduce myself to a stranger. I hate starting that conversation.

And because I know I hate it and I know I SHOULD be doing it, I can’t.

For anyone who is shy, you know the feeling. You want to talk to someone but deep down inside you clam up. Your voice shuts down and while you are intelligent and thoughtful, you have nothing to say. Nothing at all.

And to be honest, I don’t think networking is fair. Networks are the privilege of who you know. If you grow up poor, with very little connections to people with advance education and advance careers, your lack of network is just another hurdle for your advancement towards life.

And if you ever wondered whats the point of affirmative action, I just told you; its a stepping stool for those who are out of the network.

Personally, as a person who works in the non profit field, I am anti networking. I didn’t hire people I knew. I hired people who took the time to apply for an advertised job and I fairly assessed that person’s skills based on their resume and interview. To me, that was my effort to slightly level the playing field when life already throws mountains at many of us.

Unfortunately, I could never convince this to my supervisor, who tended to only hire people she knew. And unfortunately, I have yet to convince the rest of the world of this method.